By Your Side
by AJ Seawiel
Summary: I'll always stand by your side; if you want me there.' 'I do. Forever.' Yuuki has been having reoccurring nightmares that leave her shaken and wrought with guilt. She knows they are trying to tell her something, but she doesn't know what. ZeroxYuuki.
1. Destruction

**A/N:** Yuuki/Zero with a pinch of Yuuki/Kaname, and a lot of angst and drama sprinkled with cuteness and fluff (figure _that_ one out!).

I hope you enjoy this because I've worked really hard on it, figuring out the plotline, and self-editing (this is the most challenging part _–sweatdrop–_) so this story actually gets completed! If you like it, please drop a review! Also, please do tell me if you notice a major grammatical, spelling, or Japanese term (such as the use of '-sempai') error; as much as I like to think my editing is flawless, I know it is far, far, _far_ from it. Thanks and enjoy!

**Story Disclaimer:** _Vampire Knight_ belongs to the wonderfully talented Matsuri Hino. The plotline of _By Your Side_, however, belongs to me, AJ Seawiel. Please note that this disclaimer will suffice for the entire fanfic.

**By Your Side  
****By: AJ Seawiel**

**One: Destruction**

_Kaname!_

I raced up the grand staircase of the Moon Dorm, shouting as I jumped each second stair. It did not matter if I woke the entire dorm; finding Kaname Kuran was of the utmost importance. I couldn't be late, I had to find him quickly, or something awful would happen.

I squealed in pain as I tripped over the last stair and landed face down on the carpet. I struggled to right myself, trying half-heartedly to ignore the pain in my toes, and managed to get to my feet. I continued sprinting down the corridor, despite my injury and the sweat gathering on my brow. Blinking back tears that threatened to overflow, I gave myself a moment to glance around at my surroundings and felt uneasy. If I hadn't seen the crescent moon over the archway before entering this dorm, I would have thought I'd walked into the wrong building.

It looked abandoned. The corridor lamps and small tables were covered in dust and cobwebs. Dust mites floated helter-skelter around my head, a few resting on my shoulders and in my hair. It appeared as if a large, clawed animal had been here not long ago; jagged marks marred the ceiling and walls, tearing off the light beige wallpaper. In certain areas, huge chunks of wood were missing from the walls, leaving pink insulation and drywall dust and debris littering the carpeted hall. Not a single light was on in the bedroom corridor, despite the fact that it was nearly two in the morning – around mid-afternoon for the vampire nobles. My heart thumped erratically and my breath caught for a moment. What had happened?

_Kaname! Kaname!_

It was very unlike the pureblood noble not to answer my calls, and, prone as I was to jumping to conclusions, I started to panic. What if something had happened to him? But that was ridiculous, right? He's Kaname Kuran, vampire noble and pureblood. Who would be ignorant enough to stand against him? But… what about everyone else?

_Ichijo-sempai?! Aido-sempai? Kain-sempai!_

I lunged forward, down the hall that led to Kaname's dorm; I felt hot tears finally roll down my cheeks. I kept shouting Kaname's name while it echoed around me, up and down the empty, unforgiving hall.

_Kaname! Kaname! Kaname!!_

I knew it was useless to continue. He couldn't hear me. He wasn't coming. I was alone and the Incident was going to occur. My legs felt like jelly, and I collapsed in a heap on the floor. I was scared, and I was useless. I knew it had already happened. I could feel it. I was too late to save him…

"KANAME!!!"

I woke to the sound of my own voice. Sitting upright in my bed, I felt my chest heave as I took deep painful breaths. My racing heart began to slow, but I could still feel the tears on my cheeks, and where the sweat had stuck my shirt to my back. My comforter was tangled up between my legs. My pillow lay forgotten on the floor.

I reached up and ran my hands through my hair, pulling at it to wake myself up more completely. My light brown hair was tangled and greasy from perspiration and tossing, and I brought my hands down again to cover my face. Why was it always the same one? Always the same feeling of loss and uselessness… pity and emptiness….

Images of the ravaged corridor came back to me in a quick flash, and I yanked my head up from my hands, willing myself to wake up. Sitting here dwelling was not doing me any good.

I disentangled myself from the blankets and strode to the door. Pulling on my slippers, I walked as quickly as I could across the three creaky floorboards just outside my dorm, trying my best not to wake the Chairman, and down the short hallway to the living room.

Through the living room window, I could see the sky lightening over the rooftops of the Sun Dormitories, the navy of midnight mixing with the dusty, lighter hues of the imminent dawn. I moved closer to the window, hugging my arms around myself. My hot breath fogged up the icy panes, reminding me that it was only the third week of January. Not exactly the best time to be walking around in just a nightshirt and slippers, even if I was inside. I shivered and turned toward the kitchen on my quest for a glass of water.

_CRASH!_

I jumped and squeaked a small, high pitched squeal of surprise. Someone was already in the kitchen! I dove behind the sofa and peeked over the top, wondering frantically how long it would take me to retrieve my Artemis Rod from my bedroom when…

"Shit! Why he has to leave that stupid…"

Oh. It was Zero.

Relieved, I stood up and walked around the sofa, willing my heart to stop racing for the second time that evening. Honestly, if this persisted, I was sure to have an anxiety attack. I walked into the kitchen, prepared to ream Zero out for scaring me like that, when I noticed a trail of blood drops on the floor leading from the refrigerator to the sink. Zero was hunched over the stainless steel sink, a dishtowel pinned to his right forearm with his left hand.

"Oh, Zero! What have you done to yourself now?" I said; my tone, I noticed, sounded worried. Well, I supposed I should be, considering a teenage vampire was standing in my kitchen, holding a towel over his arm to stem the blood flow. I flicked on the light and moved closer to him, reaching out to open the drawer next to the sink and retrieve another dishtowel. "Here," I said, handing him the clean towel, "use this one, I'll rinse that one out."

Zero nodded, grabbed the towel from my hand and switched the two, his violet eyes already showing tinges of crimson from the scent of his own blood. It wouldn't be too long now. His colourful eyes, though, showed me his thanks, and I smiled before running the tap. I furrowed my brow, trying my best to make sure I got as much blood out as I could before I threw it in the bleaching hamper. As I scrubbed, I glanced over at Zero. He was grimacing, trying to ignore the tantalizing smell of his life's sustenance. I reached up and placed a comforting hand on his left shoulder, letting him know I understood his pain, or at least I sympathized with him. All the same, when he turned his head, seeking my eyes, he looked as if he understood what I was trying to convey.

Smiling, I returned both hands to my task. I took a moment to squeeze out the last of the watered-down blood from the dishtowel before running it along to the clothing hamper. When I returned to the kitchen, Zero was reaching for the first aid kit above the stove.

"Zero, I'll do it. You go sit over there." I motioned him to one of the kitchen chairs and retrieved a second one to act as my stepladder. Zero sat down, putting his left elbow on the table and resting his head in his hand. I heard him heave a little sigh as he watched me struggle on my tiptoes, trying to locate kit.

"To your right, Yuuki."

I felt around a little to my right and my hand made contact with the cool metal of the rectangular box. I took it from the cupboard, and as I turned around, my soft shoes slipped on the seat cushion.

"Yuuki!" Zero exclaimed quickly with a sharp inhalation. I threw my arms out to my sides to balance myself, my heart skipping a beat, and yet I managed to hold on to the first aid kit. We exhaled at the same time as I, more carefully, stepped down from the chair and walked briskly over to the table.

"You're going to kill yourself one day, Yuuki -­­­ don't you have any balance at all?" he muttered as I opened the first aid box on the table. I decided to ignore his question, as it seemed rhetorical anyway; and besides, my mind wasn't in the right space to think of a clever retort. As I took out the gauze and surgical tape, Zero removed the blood-sodden dishtowel. I took a sharp breath at the sight. The cut didn't look too deep, just wide. What had he been doing?

I looked up at him expectantly, waiting for an explanation, but he simply waved it off. I rolled my eyes and turned back to his wound, dabbing it lightly with some salve before wrapping the gauze gently and thoroughly around his arm.

"Yuuki, that's enough gauze. I'm going to look like a mummy," complained Zero.

I narrowed my eyes as I looked up at him. "I'm just making sure it won't leak through! Do you want bloodstains on your uniform tomorrow?" He sighed theatrically as I returned to wrapping.

A couple more rotations and a bit of surgical tape later, and my task was finished. I stood and smiled triumphantly at my handiwork. I hardly ever did this; usually it was the opposite – Zero patching me up. I wasn't exactly what one would call 'agile,' and I had multiple scars to prove it. Plus, Zero loved to remind me of my clumsiness. Even the Chairman got a good chuckle out of my ability to walk into doorframes. It used to embarrass me, but now I'm used to it - mostly….

"Well, I think that turned out well, don't you?" Had I been fishing for a compliment, I would have been sorely disappointed; all I received was a grunt of acknowledgement. I rolled my eyes. And this was why Zero would never have a girlfriend.

Zero closed the first aid kit and stood up to put it away. He didn't even have to stand on his tiptoes, the bugger. I was jealous of his six-foot-one height; I hated being only five-foot-three. It made situations like this embarrassing, not to mention annoying. Sometimes, I could swear he purposely flaunted the fact he was nearly a foot taller than me. Turning, I scooped up the bloody dishtowel from the kitchen table and proceeded to the sink to rinse it out.

After a moment, I felt Zero's eyes on me, and I turned my head to look at him. He was standing behind me, looking rather awkward. Like he'd been caught doing something he shouldn't have. I couldn't guess why, though… Maybe he had been doing something earlier, the thing that caused his injury? I turned back to the sink and continued to scrub the towel, my face flushing pink with anger. What? Did he think I was going to tattle on him or something? How old were we, six? We were past tattling when we met one another, for God's sake!

I turned off the water and spun on my heel to face him. Again, he looked a little ashamed. I balanced my hands on my hips and looked at him sternly. "Whatever you were doing, Zero, it doesn't matter. I'm not going to tell the Chairman!"

Zero's eyes widened and a slight blush crept up onto his cheeks. "I – I wasn't doing anything!" He said and then turned to the fridge. "I was trying to make a sandwich when you came in. I was balancing the Chairman's dish of leftovers – you know the one with the chip in it? – on my arm and it fell off and cut me." He opened the refrigerator door to reveal a messy mixture of leftover liver and yam stroganoff, broken pieces of china, and saran wrap on the bottom of the fridge.

So that was the crash.

I stared into the fridge, amazed. "How on earth did you miss the floor?"

Zero shrugged. "I tried to save it with my leg." He pointed down at his pajama pants and, sure enough, a small blobby stain of liver and yam was present. He bent down and grabbed the largest piece of china from the mess, trying to stack the rest of the litter on top. I brought out the rubbish bin from underneath the sink. "Thanks," he said, scooping it all into the bin. When he finished, I was offered him the bloodstained dishtowel I had cleaned and left in the sink.

"Might as well," I said, shrugging, when he raised an eyebrow at me.

He took the damp towel from my outstretched hand and scrubbed the bottom of the fridge. When finished, he threw it into the rubbish bin, on top of the leftover stroganoff, and carried the bin back to its cupboard. I closed the refrigerator door and moved to where Zero stood next to the sink. His eyes had returned to their violet shade, but he was glaring at the sink as if trying to burn a hole right through it. Once more, I placed a hand on his shoulder.

After a few moments, his right hand crossed his chest to cover mine. I flipped my hand over and gave his a gentle squeeze. "Zero, are you okay?"

His eyes softened, and his glare disappeared before he turned to face me, his hand pulling mine down to clasp together between us. I looked down at our intertwined hands and then quickly back up at his face. His amethyst eyes may have softened, but they still held a silent ache behind them. I bent my gaze downward again to hide the tears starting to well, and reached with my other hand for his to fiddle awkwardly. It was a nervous habit, fiddling with my own hands; his much larger one just happened to be in the way this time.

"Yuuki?" My eyes snapped up to meet his. A half-smile played on his lips as he looked down at me. For a moment I thought I could see the distress in his eyes disappear, but it was only for a moment. My mind must have been clouded by the smile. He rarely smiled, and I could only smile widely in response, even though I knew my eyes must be glossed over with telling tears.

"Yuuki, I know what you're thinking. Don't worry about me. I can take care of myself." He pulled his hands from my anxious fingers and slipped over to the cupboard to fill a glass with water. He held it out for me. "You came for this, right?" I nodded, but when I reached for it I gasped and my eyes widened in horror.

I remembered why I came here tonight.

The nightmare.

The destroyed corridor.

Screaming for Kaname who would never come.

And… the incident…

My hands started to tremble as nausea rose in my stomach. The overwhelming feeling of guilt, uselessness, and self-loathing took me over, and I turned into the sink just in time. As I retched into the sink, I felt Zero slide his cool hands across my cheeks and back to hold my hair at the base of my neck. I shivered at the lightness of his touch and icy hands that contrasted with my warm neck. A couple moments later, I was finished, and Zero let my hair go to pass me the glass.

I looked at the water for a second before realizing it was too soon to think about liquids. I shook my head in response - much too rapidly.

"Yuuki!" Zero caught me before I crumpled onto the floor. Cold arms took me up under my knees and back as he braced me against his hard chest. Zero knelt on the floor, holding me as I lay limp in his arms. The room started spinning and I closed my eyes, wrapping my arms around his neck and burrowing my head into his navy blue t-shirt. Why was everything spinning!? Make it stop; I'm going to be sick, again…

"Yuuki?" Zero said softly. "Did you…have another nightmare?"

I nodded furiously into his chest, and I felt him stand up, keeping me steady against his chest. Zero started walking; he must have been walking slowly because I could hardly feel the movement. I was thankful for that.

A few minutes later I heard the creak of the floorboards outside my room. He bent down slightly to reach the handle; inside, he set me down gently on the bed. My eyes were suddenly very heavy with sleep as he picked up the pillow from the floor, tucked it under my head, and fixed and pulled the comforter up over my limp body. He carefully removed my slippers, each hitting the floor with a soft 'thud.' I opened my eyes slightly to see him leaning over me, and I saw the flicker of conflict in his eyes. Then, hesitantly, he kissed my forehead and stood up to walk away.

Had I been in any state of mind to realize what I was doing, I probably wouldn't have grabbed his wrist right there. But I did.

"Zero?" I barely registered the sound as my own voice. "Can you… just… sit here, please? Just 'til I fall asleep?"

Even through the state of my drowsiness, I saw that struggle once again in his clear amethyst eyes, but he nodded and pulled the desk chair over to my bed.

"Thankzero," I slurred and closed my eyes again. For a moment, I felt the coolness of his hand brush against my cheek. I smiled, feeling undisturbed sleep take me into its arms.

_Goodnight, Yuuki…_

**o.o.0.o.o**

**A/N:** The second version of chapter one! :-)


	2. Walking In His Shadow

**Two: Walking In His Shadow**

Though my eyes were dry and heavy with sleep, I would not close them. Though my back ached from sitting upright for the past five hours, I would not leave this wooden chair next to her. And, although the sun began to steal through the slight opening of the thick green curtain, I certainly would not wake her from her dreamless rest. If she wanted me to stay with her I would. I would stay next to her forever if she wanted. If I could, I would take her nightmares away in an instant.

I would do anything to please her, to make her happy, to make her smile…

Even if she would never feel the same way for me as I do for her.

I shifted on my seat, pushing my arms forward, trying to stretch out the stiffness in my back. The pain wasn't unbearable. Not yet. I straightened myself again, absently glancing at my watch as my hand came to rest on my knee. Seven fifty-two. I would be late for class, but that wasn't exactly a new turn of events. I rubbed my tired eyes, knowing I would probably drift off during class. That wasn't new either. I twisted my upper body left, then right, trying to work out the few leftover kinks.

The rustle of blankets, and a quiet, satisfied moan caused me to freeze. Had my movements stirred her? I watched the sleeping form of Yuuki Cross turn over onto her side to face me, a small smile playing across her lips. Well, thank god she wasn't having another nightmare. I'd like to think I had something to do with that. I grinned to myself. _Yeah right_.

She breathed slowly, calmly, in and out, her abdomen rising and falling with each take. Light brown bangs fell haphazardly, framing her heart-shaped face. Her left arm was resting across her body, while her right was bent at the elbow, her hand in an unclenched fist near her head. That smile, even if it was only a hint of what she was truly capable of, grasped me. It took me in, and like everything else about her, held me captive. She looked so peaceful, I didn't want to wake her, but we did have class. And prefect duties.

Slowly, my hand rose to caress her face and push the bangs from her eyes, but I stopped in the air. What was I doing? I shouldn't be touching her; not like this. Not while I did it with intentions far deeper than the brotherly ones she thought I held for her. Not while she didn't feel the same. Not while Kaname Kuran held her heart in his hands. No. As much as I longed to touch her and feel her warm, gentle skin beneath my fingers, I knew it was wrong. I had let myself go last night, but I would control myself better.

For both our sakes…

Instead, I let my hand rest on her left shoulder and gently shook her awake. "Yuuki?" I spoke barely above a whisper, my voice cracking slightly from the lack of moisture. I cleared my throat, swallowed, and shook her again, saying her name more loudly this time. "Yuuki! Wake up, we have class."

Yuuki's large amber eyes fluttered open. For a moment, she could only blink against the bright rays of light sneaking through the curtain. Yuuki looked at me with a bewildered, half-asleep expression; her eyes plainly asked me why I was shaking her awake. Then she seemed to recall the past events of the night as a look of comprehension dawned her features. She nodded at me, and I removed my hand from her shoulder as she scrunched up her face and raised her arms above her in a long stretch. Yuuki yawned, which I soon mimicked, and she stole a quick glance at her alarm clock.

I watched as her eyes widened in surprise when she registered, after a moment, that the green digits read _8:09_. "Zero!" She croaked, her voice still dry from sleep, "Why didn't my alarm go off!? And why are you still standing there in your pajamas? We're going to be late!" I resisted the urge to laugh as she tried, much too quickly for her ability level, to get out of the tangled mess of sheets. She struggled to disentangle herself, but she ended up stumbling out of her bed, dragging the sheets along behind her until she was finally able to shake them off her right foot. She was quite a sight: her hair was sticking up at all angles, her eyes were frantic with worry about being late for class again, and she donned a single sock underneath her nightdress. I couldn't help it, I snorted.

Yuuki, who had been retrieving her uniform from the closet, while throwing needless articles of clothing on the floor behind her, turned to glare at me, hands on her hips. "And what are you laughing at? You're not dressed yet either!" She waved her new set of socks at me, and continued to search through her wardrobe. She was so adorable when she was panicked. I strode past her to the door, letting her continue her morning frenzy. But just as I was turning the handle, I heard the furious tossing stop.

"Zero?"

I turned to face her; her tone was quiet and contemplative. "Yes?"

She smiled at me and my heart missed a beat completely. "Thank you," she said, "for staying with me all night. You really didn't have to…" Her eyes were glossy and twinkling with gratitude. I turned the left corner of my mouth up a little in return and nodded before leaving her room to allow her to get ready.

_Anything for you, Yuuki…_

o.o.0.o.o

"Yuuki, you look exhausted. Did you get any sleep last night?"

"A little." I yawned and propped my tired head up on the table. It wouldn't be so bad, honestly. If this was any other class, I would most likely be able to stay awake, but it was just something about that overwhelming and painful mix of numbers and letters on the blackboard that drained the little bit of energy I had. I hate Algebra. _Maybe Zero will tutor me later…_

I turned around to check on Zero, who was seated behind me; he was snoring lightly into his arms which were folded on the table. I sighed as I turned back to the professor. So much for that plan.

Sayori Wakaba, the blonde girl seated on my right, and my best friend, was silently taking in the lecture while copying perfectly legible notes. I was jealous of her note-taking skills. Even if I managed to understand the nonsensical sentences a professor was lecturing, my notes were always illegible, even to myself. I wasted my studying blocks trying to decipher my own handwriting while Yori and Zero grasped concepts far beyond the reach of my sixteen-year-old mind. I often wished I could borrow just a fraction of their brains, maybe a bit more during exam week, which, unfortunately, happened to be the following week.

The bell rang, and I sighed in relief. The feeling of drowning in a sea of inescapable numbers was over for another day. Yori and I packed up our books, and I turned around to pinch Zero awake. I felt terrible doing it, considering he had stayed awake all night to make sure I was all right. But if I didn't wake him, the professor was bound to notice he had been sleeping and set him a make-up class. I really didn't want that to happen, class changeover was difficult enough with the both of us; it would be torturous without Zero's icy glare keeping the Day Class girls in their place.

I pinched Zero lightly on the arm and squeaked. Almost instantaneously, he had grasped my wrist in a strong grip and refused to let go, despite my futile attempts at escape. "Zero," I hissed at him, "you're cutting off my circulation! Let go!" I yanked hard and felt his grip loosen at the same time. My arms went out in a jerky movement to steady myself, but I had too much momentum and found myself sitting on the floor of the lecture hall, my rear end now in a lot of pain. I heard Yori stifle a giggle behind me, and I felt my face flush as I stood up, rubbing the area of injury. For the second time that day, Zero snorted at me, and I looked up at him as he rose from his seat. I felt my face grow even hotter with fury when he ruffled my hair, and walked past me down the stairs.

"You coming, Yuuki? We have changeover." He threw at me over his shoulder. All I could do was stand there, my mouth opening and closing as I searched for an angry retort. Regrettably, I couldn't find one suitable enough before he exited the room, and I exhaled through my lips in frustrated exasperation. Yori giggled again from my left, covering her mouth with her hand.

She smiled at me when I rounded on her, a little hurt. "Oh, come on, Yuuki! You have to admit, it was a little funny." She giggled again. "And very much like you, too."

I rolled my eyes, walked down the stairs, and out the door, a snickering _best friend_ in tow.

"Why does he always insist on embarrassing me at every opportunity?" I seethed when we reached Yori's dorm room. "I embarrass myself enough as it is! I don't need his help to -" I cut off in the middle of my rant while I watched Yori deposit her books on her desk and then reach into the drawer and pull out a tube of mascara and light pink lip gloss. She was just starting to unscrew the lid of the mascara when she saw me staring at her, my face probably looked rather surprised.

"Yuuki? Wh – Why are you looking at me like that?" She asked timidly and clearly anxious from my bewildered expression.

After a minute, I noted that my mouth was slightly open in a rather un-ladylike way and that I was staring at her. I fixed my face into a warm smile. "I was just surprised, that's all. You don't normally wear any makeup, what's the occasion?"

To my even greater surprise, little spots of light pink dotted both of Yori's cheeks. "Nothing! I'm just, you know, experimenting, that's all! I mean, I'm sixteen years old, I have to start wearing make up at some point in my life, right?" She grinned at me, turning back to the small mirror hanging above her desk. Well, there wasn't anything strange about that... was there?

"You don't even need it, Yori, you know that right?" I complimented her. "Your eyes are beautiful. I wish I had green eyes as bright as yours." Her face turned a little pinker.

"Oh, you know your eyes are pretty, too, Yuuki! They're so expressive," she replied while trying to apply mascara simultaneously.

"Ouch!" She turned to grimace at me. "I poked myself!"

I laughed as she turned back to the mirror to finish her other eye, and checked my watch. Crap! I looked out Yori's dorm window at the sun beginning to set behind the row of oak trees. It was nearly twilight and time for the class changeover! "Sorry, Yori, I have to go meet Zero before the changeover. See you there?" I reached for the door handle as she replied in the affirmative, and took off down the corridor.

When I reached the archway to the entrance of the Sun Dorms, Zero was waiting for me. He was leaning up against the arch, one leg propped against the cold concrete, his arms folded across his chest, his head tilted upwards towards the changing sky. I stopped for a moment and just watched as the light breeze ruffled his silver hair and burgundy necktie. His pale skin contrasted elegantly with the golden glow of the sunset, and for once his violet eyes held nothing but peace within their normally uneasy depths as he watched the sun sink slowly below the trees. Had I been a great artist I would have chosen to paint him here, looking almost… angelic.

"What are you staring at, Yuuki?" His voice floated through my daze and snapped me out of my reverie. Had I been staring? How long had I been staring? Was I really _staring?_ I bit my bottom lip and flushed a light pink, embarrassed at my own thoughts. Then I saw the corner of his mouth tilt up into what was clearly a well defined smirk.

_Wait! I can't have been staring at him. I most definitely was _not_ staring at him! I'm taken. Unavailable. Off the market. I cannot be caught staring at other guys! That seems really… unfaithful…_

I shook my head to clear it and strode past him defiantly, tossing my hair over my shoulder. "I wasn't staring at anything, Zero."

Zero took three long strides and caught up with me. "Yes, you were. You were staring at _me_. Weren't you, Yuuki?" _Of all the nerve…!_

I rounded on him defensively, but I could feel the embarrassment burning my cheeks. I tried my best to ignore his cocky grin as I replied, "I was not staring at _you_, Zero! I was merely admiring the… _scene_ you happened to be a part of!" Zero looked slightly put off, and I spun on my heel and huffed towards the Moon Dorms.

"So, you were _admiring_ me, hey?" Zero whispered softly into my ear, his cool breath tickled the hair on my neck and I shivered involuntarily. He had caught up with me once again, and he was walking so close I could feel his left hand brush against my right as they swung in the air. "Well, that's certainly much better than just _staring,_ but I'm not sure how I feel about it. I'm also sure the _Pureblood_ would have a thing or two to say as well."

I tried to stay calm, but I knew my face was giving me away; my eyes widened in horrified surprise at his last comment. Did he know that was what I had been thinking, too? My face fell as the realization of what I had done hit me.

I had looked at another guy and found him to be very attractive.

I really like Kaname. I have liked him for a long time; I have had feelings for him as long as I can remember. Ever since that fateful winter night when he had rescued me, I knew there would be no other boy for me. And that was why he could never know about this day. I couldn't bear to hurt him. I couldn't stand to see the devastation in his face.

I felt guilty, as if I had been purposely unfaithful to Kaname. How would he take it if he knew? As far as I was aware, Kaname had never even glanced at another girl in the same way he looks at me. And here _I_ was, thinking someone else looked _angelic._ My heart sunk lower, if that was possible, at the thought of the hurt expression that would cross his face if I told him; I felt as low, no, _lower_ than dirt.

I squeezed my eyes shut briefly and felt a few tears escape and roll down my cheeks. Quickly, I wiped them away, afraid that Zero would notice. But he didn't. He had let me walk ahead of him by a couple feet. I looked back and saw him following me, staring at the ground, hands in his pockets, a contemplative, hurt look on his face. I didn't know what to say, so I turned back and fell silent as we pressed on to perform our prefect duties.

As Zero and I neared the archway of the Moon Dorms, I could already make out a mass of Day Class girls surrounding the entrance. They were all giggling, squealing and talking very animatedly in anticipation. I looked around, absentmindedly, searching for Yori when, suddenly two things happened that caught my attention.

Two girls, a ginger and a blonde, near the front of the queue, started pushing one another and screaming insults, just as a second duo tried to climb up the entrance wall for a better view of the Night Class. I inhaled sharply, not sure which duet to go after first. Saving the adventurous girls seemed more imperative, considering they could fall and hurt themselves at any given moment, but the female wrestlers were stirring up quite a scene and also some tag-teams. I felt Zero's hand brush my shoulder, and take off toward the fighters, now hurling nasty names at each other. He easily separated the two with his icy stare, and they shrunk back, silent, but still seething. At least one catastrophe was under control.

I turned my attention to the girls climbing the wall. Elbowing my way through the horde of Day Class girls (the crowd seemed to have thickened significantly in the past two minutes,) I pulled out my whistle and blew it, raising my hands in the air. "Quiet, everyone!" I shouted in my best 'bad-prefect' voice, "You two on the wall! Stop climbing and come down! You will be able to see all the Night Class students in a few minutes along with everyone else! Trust me, the view is just as good down here as it is up there, and also a lot safer!"

"Oh, Cross-san! We won't hurt ourselves!" The rock-climbing brunette scoffed.

"Yes, Miss Prefect, let us just have a little peek! Then we'll come down!"

I blew my whistle a second time. "That is _not_ going to happen! Please come down from there! Do I have to get Kiryuu-kun to drag you down?" As if on cue, Zero appeared at my side, cold glare set in place. The girls took one look at Zero's expression, glanced at each other, and, dejectedly, started their descent. I let out a breath of relief. One more accident avoided. Almost…

The brunette missed her footing about five feet above where I was standing. All I heard was a shrill cry, and then felt something very heavy fall onto my person. "Ah! Sorry, Cross-san!"

"Idiot!" I heard a deeper voice grumble as the weight was lifted quickly off of my back, and I was yanked to my feet. "Are you al – shit!" Before he turned away, I saw Zero's eyes begin to turn from expressive violet to uncontrollable crimson. Confused, I looked down and my own eyes widened. There was a dark red stain on my lapel. I gently peeled my blouse away from my skin and saw the cut on my collarbone already beginning to swell around the edges. It was too late. I had seen the bloodlust in Zero's eyes.

CREAK...

"IDOL-SEMPAI!!!"

"WILD-SEMPAI!!!"

_Fantastic._

The screech of the Day Class girls was almost unbearably shrill as the large, oak front gates swung open slowly to admit the Night Class. I opened my eyes that had closed automatically a moment ago at the blood-curdling noise, and scanned the crowd for Zero. I couldn't see him anywhere. What was I going to do? I couldn't leave my prefect post to go after Zero – the Day Class girls would imminently seize the golden opportunity to pounce unforgiving on the entire Night Class – but I couldn't just wait here! Not while Zero was off somewhere, in pure, torturous agony, trying to quench his thirst before he bit someone.

I bounced, anxiously, from my left foot to my right, trying to come up with a plan, all the while attempting to hold back the Day Class from attacking. _If only I could split myself in two...!_ Wait... that was it! I whipped my head back and forth, eyes searching helplessly, until I saw her. Yori was standing to one side of the queue, arms folded across her chest, a look of defined vexation on her face. I was proud of my best friend, she had never been one of these simpering, squealing girls I was trying to hold back, and I respected her for that.

"Yori-chan!" I shouted above the din as it increased dramatically at the sight of the first pair of Night Class students, Hanabusa Aido, who was waving and winking at every admiring female within sight, and Akatsuki Kain; his book bag was thrown over his shoulder, his eyes rolling exasperatedly at the antics of his younger cousin.

Yori tore her disapproving eyes away from the mob of smitten girls to look at me, her eyebrows raised in questioning. "Yori-chan! Please – oof! – come here!" I elbowed a couple of girls out of the way who were dangerously close to touching Aido's outstretched arm, and received a swift shove to my stomach in response. Yori struggled her way through a line of giggling girls, and appeared at my side, a little red in the face from the effort.

"What is it, Yuuki-chan?" She glanced around, a bewildered expression on her face. "Where is Zero-kun?"

I instinctively tugged a blonde girl back into the queue, getting an electrifying glare in return. "Yori-chan! I need you to look after these girls for me! I have to go find Zero, he took off on me!"

Yori's face blanched as she turned to stare at the mob of love-struck females. She shook her head at me. "Oh, Yuuki-chan, I don't know… I-I'm not a prefect! They wouldn't listen to a word I said!" I could see the fear in her wide, green eyes. I knew what she was thinking: _I'll be killed!_

I took her by the shoulders and looked straight into her eyes. "Yori-chan! This is really very important! I _have_ to find Zero – he isn't feeling… right," I struggled to find the right words, not wanting to give away his true identity, "and I'm the only one who can help him! Please, Yori-chan, please!"

Yori bit her bottom lip, staring worriedly at me, but after a moment of deliberation gave me a small nod. I smiled, breathing a sigh of relief. I squeezed her shoulders and then rolled my prefect armband off, giving her that and my whistle. I looked at her sternly. "Don't let them walk all over you, Yori-chan. You can do this, I know you can, you're just as strong, if not stronger, than I am." I took her right hand in both of mine, gave it comforting squeeze, and turned her to face the Day Class. "Good luck! I'll be back as soon as I can!"

As I ran off in the direction of the wood, I glanced back quickly to watch Yori pull the prefect armband up her arm, a petrified albeit determined look on her face. I sighed again, a slight smile on my face. She would be all right. We were very similar – she would pull it off.

I sprinted forward into the grove of thick oak trees that surrounded Cross Academy campus, unaware of the pair of questioning, concerned brown eyes that followed my retreating form.

It took me over ten minutes, stumbling over hidden roots, getting whacked in the face by stray branches, snagging and tearing my pleated skirt on a bramble, until I finally caught sight of his discarded uniform blazer; the prefect armband was still attached to its right sleeve. I slowed my pace just enough to grab it as I ran by. I was not going to stop until I found him, despite the fact that I was out of breath and my blouse stuck to my back from perspiration.

To be honest, I was glad he had run, most likely instinctively, into a secluded area; it would make everything much more private. No one could know about our little exchanges – not the Chairman, not Yori, not Kaname. Especially not Kaname. Somehow I do not think my pureblood vampire boyfriend would be too keen on the fact that I shared my blood willingly with another; even if the other vampire was my adopted brother. There had only been a couple close calls so far: once when the Chairman nearly walked in on us in the kitchen, and once when Zero lost control during a PE class when a classmate fell and cut her knee on the pavement. I had to drag him, with difficulty, away to the girls' locker room before anything happened.

I knew he hated it. I knew he hated that he was slowly being consumed by the Level E inside him. That horrifying creature revealed itself every once in a while, and Zero always looked so guilty after I couldn't help my heart from constricting. But if I could help him by offering what little I had to give, then I would. It made me so happy to help him. It made me smile when I saw the agony in his expressive eyes disappear for a moment; the moment when Zero had control over himself again.

"Ugggh!" I heard a deep moan rise from the wood's silence. My legs hurt, but I knew I was close and urged myself forward towards the sound. I had to help him. I was the only one who could. And… it was _my_ fault he felt this way. It had been the scent of _my_ blood that triggered the animal he kept caged inside him. I felt my eyes swell with tears; it wasn't fair for him to be like this. Screaming silently, trapped within himself, and no one heard. No one cared…

Except for me.

The tears were now streaming down my face, and I couldn't stop them, even if I wanted to. I choked back a sob and kept running.

"Uggggh!" Another moan – _Oh, where are you, Zero?!_ I finally reached the edge of the wood, stopped, and looked out through the few younger oaks onto the campus, searching for him. The full moon shone brightly upon the meadow, reflecting off the tiny swells the light January breeze made on the lake. It was starting to get cold; I could see my breath as I sharply inhaled and exhaled. My eyes scanned quickly across the meadow, the lake and…There! He was leaning against one of the stone walls that ran around to border the Sun Dorms from the wood and lake, his shoulders sagging, his left hand held up to his neck, scratching and tearing at his burning tattoo. Heart pounding, and my breathing ragged, I started off again toward him.

Zero was facing away from me when I reached him, but I knew he could sense and… smell… that I was behind him. I did my best to quiet my breathing, and I reached up to touch his shoulder, to give him comfort. He shrunk away from me as soon as my fingertips grazed his white school shirt. "No, Yuuki!" He whispered hoarsely, "Do-Don't touch me!"

I took my hand away, clenching my fists in front of me, and shook my head fiercely, my eyes shut tight. I couldn't stand this! Didn't he know by now that my blood was his?! That he could take from me when he needed it? I dove forward impulsively, heedless to his command, and wrapped my arms around his waist and buried my face in his back, embracing him tightly from behind. I knew my tears were soaking through his shirt; I could feel the dampness spreading across my cheeks, but I didn't care. I felt him stiffen underneath my touch.

"Zero," I said as sternly as I could manage, but my voice sounded gargled and weak, "I'm not afraid of you! Please, take what you need –"

"Yuuki!" He interrupted, "I can't keep taking from you like this! It… It's wrong." I felt him shudder, and try to wrench himself away, but I held on tighter.

"You haven't drunk anything in a week, Zero! I know you need it! You needed it last night in the kitchen – I saw your eyes flash!" Zero stiffened again. "Please, Zero… please… I can't take it… seeing you in this much pain…" I felt a fresh set of tears fall down my cheeks as I let my arms drop to my sides, releasing him from my hold. I knew he wouldn't do anything he did not want to, so I just had to wait. I was staring at the blades of grass blow softly in the breeze for a full two minutes before I heard him turn around to face me. I snapped my head up and looked straight into his bloodthirsty, crimson eyes with an expression I hoped to God held no fear, because I was not scared. No. I could never be scared of him. Not of Zero. Not when his eyes showed as much anguish and fear as they did right now. My heart broke, seeing him like this. No, I could never be scared of him. I only wanted to help him. And that's what I chose to do.

I smiled at him, shrugged off my black blazer, and began unbuttoning the top two buttons of my white uniform blouse. I kept eye contact with him the entire time, not daring to look away from those tortured crimson eyes. Zero closed his eyes and took a deep breath, inhaling the coppery scent of the dried blood on my shirt, and his fangs lengthened instinctively. He opened his eyes and looked at me, still holding his neck, covering his tattoo. "Yuuki… I can't," he groaned, "Are you sure?"

I reached up with my right hand and placed it on top of his left one on his neck. Smiling, I nodded. "Yes, Zero… please let me help you."

Zero looked tempted but then caught himself, his features twisting into a pained expression. "No, Yuuki! Not when… not when I'm this thirsty. I'll take too much! I-I'll kill you!" He whipped around and buried his face in his right hand, still ripping at his neck with his left. _Oh, Zero…_

Slowly, I walked around him and stood in front of him. I reached up, pulled his hand away from his face, and held it in both of mine. He looked down at me, with an expression of deepest self-loathing. He held his breath, probably trying to knock back his bloodlust a few notches by not breathing in my scent. I stared at him, my amber eyes boring deep into his crimson ones, and tried to express my feelings through them.

_Zero, please, let me help you. I can't bear to see you like this. _

_You won't take too much. You won't kill me…_

"I trust you," I said softly, smiling at him through the tears tracing lines down my cheeks.

I saw his animal eyes widen in surprise as the human within tried to overpower him. He groaned in anticipation as I titled my head, exposing the soft flesh to his sight. I tossed my head, trying to clear his path of my hair and took his hand, wrapping it around my waist. He couldn't wait any longer. Zero's right arm tightened very gently around my body, and his trembling left hand came down to move the remaining hair to the side. Very slowly he bent his head down, so it stopped right above my exposed neck. I could feel my heart beating out an irregular rhythm, much too fast for what was normal. I could feel his ragged breath on my neck, and as he pulled me tighter against his chest, I felt his heartbeat accelerate.

He bent even lower, and I relaxed, closing my eyes, waiting for him. "Yu-Yuuki," he whispered huskily, his breath tickling my skin, sending goosebumps up my arms, "are you… s-sure?"

My hands, which had been hanging loosely by my sides, reached up to tangle themselves in his hair. I gently pushed his head down, so his lips rested against my neck. "I trust you, Zero." I repeated, a little breathlessly, but firmly.

After a second, I felt his lips part and his tongue dart out to moisten my neck before his fangs pierced my skin. My closed eyelids twitched slightly as the sharp, foreign objects punctured my flesh, but the pain passed as quickly as it had started when he began to drink.

He was thirsty. Much more than ever before, since he had gone so long without taking from me. Zero drank steadily and quickly, trying to quench his thirst and hunger at the same time. My hands twisted into the strands of his soft, silver hair, as his right tightened around my waist. I let out a small, almost inaudible sigh, it felt good to have Zero hold me and take from me like this. Before Zero took my blood for the first time back in November, I had always wondered why the prey of other vampires didn't try to escape. It made logical sense to want to escape from something so horrifying. But after that first time, I completely understood the reason why.

It was as if you were locked in some sort of hypnotic, bliss filled trance. Your heart started to pound in your chest at the mere anticipation of sharing your life's sustenance with them, waiting, the adrenaline rushing through you, for their fangs to sink gratefully into your neck. Every tendon in your body was attuned to them as soon as they started to take your blood. You felt every drop they spilt slide slowly down your neck. You felt electricity course through your skin at every caress, every touch, every sudden movement. But the best part, by far, was their need. Not the need itself. No. Feeling their need made you die inside. It was the ultimate starvation. It made you want to give everything you had if it would just help them feel full and alive again; if it would stop them from hurting. You knew you would give all of it up, just for that person. And that person alone. Because, deep down, you could feel they didn't want this. Any of it. They didn't want to turn into a senseless, rabid animal, thinking of nothing else but of how hungry they were. They never wanted to bite you and take a part of your life away and devour it just to feel human again. They would rather die than have to put you through this horrific experience. But, to be able to give them their sanity back with just a few mouthfuls of yourself, just a little of the blood you would never use, and sustain their humanity for just a little longer, well…

_It was worth everything…_

After a few more mouthfuls, I felt Zero pull his fangs out of my neck, and lick away the blood he had spilt. I smiled, my eyes still closed, as I disentangled my hands from his hair, and started to pull slowly away. But, surprisingly, he wouldn't let me go. Instead, Zero's left arm moved from its previous position in my hair to wrap around my waist and hold me tight to him.

"Thank you, Yuuki." I heard him whisper into my hair. I couldn't help it, my eyes started to gloss over again and I threw my arms over his shoulders, reaching up on my tiptoes.

"Anytime, Zero," I replied quietly as we stood there, embracing, our hair floating in the slight breeze. Right then, nothing else mattered. Nothing was left except feeling that I had helped him. The feeling that I had helped him become Zero again, even if it was only for a short while. I was happy.

Not five minutes later, I heard a cough from behind Zero and opened my eyes, peering over his broad shoulder.

"Kaname!" Instantly, Zero and I unlatched ourselves from one another and turned away, flushing. I stared down at the ground; I could feel the heated embarrassment radiating off my cheeks. This was so much worse than merely thinking another guy attractive…

"Yuuki. Kiryuu-kun." He greeted softly. He didn't sound angry. I chanced glancing at his face, and was surprised. Rather than look angry that I was formerly embracing Zero, he almost looked… amused? I lifted my head to its full extension and anxiously twisted my hands together in front of me. What would I say? How was I going to explain this? Before I could form a coherent answer, I heard Zero formulate a reply.

"Kuran, don't be mad at Yuuki. She was only helping me to control my bloodlust so I wouldn't bite another student, and ruin the secret we're all trying to keep." I turned to look at Zero, and saw a glare on his face, despite his still rather pink cheeks.

I took a brief side glance at Kaname, and his eyes were guarded, completely unreadable. Then he sighed. "Kiryuu-kun, I am not angry with Yuuki. Nor am I angry with you." He turned to look at me, "If Yuuki wishes to help you by supplying her blood it is her own choice. I cannot say I approve, but it is not for me to decide. I will take Yuuki back to her dorm, Kiryuu, I wish to speak with her."

Zero stiffened, his eyes narrowed in Kaname's direction, and he looked as if he was about to protest, but then thought better of it. He sighed and turned to look at me, his eyes were back to their expressional amethyst, and I read the warning:

_Be careful, Yuuki…_

I smiled to comfort him. "Zero, why don't you head back and help the Chairman with dinner? I would hate to have to force a smile through another of his experimental dishes. I'll see you in a bit, okay?" I waved cheerily, regardless of the fact I felt my stomach twisting into knots, and watched him walk towards the main building, his hands in his trouser pockets. I watched him until he rounded the corner of the stone border and then bit my lip, turning to face my boyfriend.

And then I found myself babbling. "Kaname, I'm sorry you found out like this. About Zero and me, I mean… well, not _Zero and me_, more or less only Zero… taking blood from me. But it's only been happening for two months, and I was going to tell you, but I didn't know how and I thought you would –" I was silenced by two of his fingers covering my lips.

"Yuuki, sweetheart, if you say it was nothing, I believe you. You do not have to prove anything to me." Kaname replied, with a small smile. I read the forgiveness in his eyes and dove forward, wrapping my arms around his waist. _Thank goodness…_

"I cannot say I'm surprised," He said, embracing me, "I have smelt his scent on you from time to time." I stiffened in his arms, and he chuckled. "Don't worry, I did not think anything of it. You do live in the same building, eat the same meals, watch television on the same sofa. I'm not so possessive as to assume otherwise."

We started walking back to the main building, my hand in his. "I'm sorry, Kaname, I really am. I wanted to tell you… I just didn't know how to without making it sound…"

He smiled down at me. "As if you were being unfaithful?"

I nodded, my face starting to flush again, and I stumbled over a stray rock in the path.

"Careful, sweetheart," he said, chuckling, as he grabbed my arm and kept me from falling flat on my nose, "Perhaps we should have your head examined. There might be something wrong with your cerebellum."

I pouted at his teasing words, and punched his arm lightly. "Okay, enough jabs at my inability to walk in a straight line!"

Kaname pulled me close to his chest, wrapping his arms around my shoulders. I felt his body quake with silent laughter. "You are adorable when you pout, Yuuki, I can't help it." I felt my heart constrict a little, and all my frustration melted away with his words as I embraced him.

"Kaname?"

"Yes, sweetheart?"

I pulled away from him, a serious expression on my face. I didn't want him to be uncomfortable with me offering my blood to Zero. Technically, all my blood should belong to Kaname, considering he was the one I had chosen to be with; however, the fact he was pureblood had made that near impossible. He refused to turn me into a vampire until I was certain it was what I wanted. He refused to take my life unless I was willing to give it to him. I wasn't sure yet of what I wanted, but I was sure I didn't want him to feel as if I was only sharing my blood with Zero, and not purposely holding out on him.

"Are you sure you're okay with Zero and me? With him drinking my blood I mean?"

Kaname sighed and looked up at the stars for a moment, formulating an answer, before he looked back down at me. "I cannot say I am overjoyed with the situation, because I most certainly am not, but I understand. Yuuki, if you feel it is something you have to do, by all means, do not let my feelings for you stand in your way. I would not want to make you feel as if you are obligated to share your blood only with me. If it makes you happy to help Kiryuu-kun, then do so. Who am I to take away what makes you happy? Wouldn't that defeat my purpose as your lover?" The corner of his lips turned up into a smile, and I beamed back at him. He understood; it was more than I could ask for.

I let him lead me the rest of the way back to the main building in silence, my heart suddenly much lighter than it had been that afternoon. Kaname knew Zero was drinking my blood, and he understood why. _I am the luckiest girl in the world…_

At the back entrance to Cross Academy's main building, we stopped and Kaname lifted my hand, still joined with his, and kissed it. "Goodnight, Yuuki. Get some sleep, you have a flustered best friend to comfort tomorrow morning, I daresay it shall be a challenge to convince her she did the right thing in helping you today."

My other hand rose to my mouth in horror. "Oh! I completely forgot about Yori-chan! Is she all right? Did she get hurt? I should go see –"

"Shhh. Tomorrow, sweetheart. Wakaba-san is well. I believe Ichijo and Senri's assistance certainly helped her a great deal."

"Oh? Did you…?" I trailed off. _Of course he did…_

He chuckled to himself and released my hand. "Goodnight, Yuuki, sleep well." He began to walk away, but I caught hold of his white uniform blazer. Kaname turned around to face me, an eyebrow raised in questioning. I placed my hands on my hips, and frowned, pouting a little for his benefit.

"What? You aren't going to kiss me goodnight?"

Kaname reached for me, pulled me close to him and placed a chaste kiss on my waiting lips. "Of course, sweetheart." I grinned and he captured my lips a second time while I reached up on my tiptoes to wrap my arms around his neck.

All too quickly, we parted, and he placed a feather light kiss on my forehead. "Goodnight, Yuuki." He turned and left, walking to towards his class. I watched him leave, a dazed smile on my face, and then opened the door to the main building. _Did I mention I was the luckiest girl in the universe?_

If I had glanced up a moment earlier, I probably would have noticed a pair of shadowed violet eyes, disappearing behind a thick green curtain.

o.o.0.o.o

**A/N:** Now that I'm actually publishing this chapter, I sort of feel it's a tad dramatic. Not my best work. But I figured you guys had waited long enough, and I'm SURE you'll tell me exactly how you feel about it, right? Reviews are wonderful motivators! :)


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